The parent – child connection is one of the cornerstones of parenting. A lot of parents worry about the connection they have with their child. It can make your parenting life much harder if there is a lack of connection with your child.
A positive parent – child connection will allow for a better line of communication to be built up. There will be a much better understanding between yourself and your child too. The rapport between you will be much stronger and more stable.
This article aims to give you 7 simple ideas to better connect with your kids. We aim to keep it simple and to the point! Follow these simple principles and you will be well on the way to achieving a much better connection with your child.
Tip 1:Always remain open and available.
People often refer to this as an “open door” policy, and this is something essential you should build up with your child. They should feel comfortable to approach you at any time, knowing that you won’t over react. Show your child you can listen to their problems or questions, no matter how busy or stressed your life may be as a parent. This open door policy will encourage your child to talk to you first and frequently!
Tip 2: Listen, Listen and……listen again!
To build a great connection and rapport with your child, you MUST take time to listen to what they have to say. It is a frequent problem with adults, that they are too impatient to allow a child to fully express themselves. The adult will get in the habit of cutting off children’s ideas and “saying their piece” way too early. Resist this temptation to interrupt and wait for your child to finish speaking before offering your own ideas. This shows your child that you are a good listener, and will make them feel more positively about conversations that you have. Don’t assume that you know what your child will say or that they need help expressing themselves.
Tip 3: The art of questioning…USE IT!
By asking appropriate questions, you are showing your child that you are listening to what they are saying and that you want to help them. It will also encourage them to fully explain their ideas, something that will help your child feel better about these conversations. Ask more open ended questions, to encourage your child to talk and explain themselves in more detail. They will feel more relaxed and positive, rather than stuck for words and possibly even defensive.
Tip 4: Be a source of talk for your child.
Don’t just use conversations as a tool to help or find out what you want to know about your child. Find the time to hold more casual conversation with your child too. By doing this, you are building a language rich environment around your child. One in which they will be encouraged to talk more and express their thoughts and ideas. By doing this, you are building that connection and rapport with your child. Don’t just use language as a functional tool, but as a fun and creative one too!
Tip 5: Be Mr (or MRS) positive!
You would be surprised how much a young child can pick up from a conversation. If you come across as bored and distracted, they will pick up on it. And remember, that things such as sarcasm are not suited to young children, and will often come across as mean rather than funny! Make sure that the wording you use with your child is always positive. These positive conversations will breed more talk and interaction.
Tip 6: Don’t “loose your rag”.
If your child starts associating you with excessive anger, they will start to shy away from conversations with you or asking your advice. It’s OK to get angry sometimes, but make it rare. This will give your anger more meaning and will make sure that your child remains happy to approach you.Try to remain calm and controlled whilst talking to your child, no matter what they tell you.
Tip 7: Let talk be natural.
The simple fact is this! You cannot force a child to talk, but you can build an environment around them that will encourage talk. If you start forcing talk from your child, it will often have the opposite effect. They will start feeling pressurised to talk and will end up talking less. Set your child up in a language rich environment, with conversations all around them. Give them the room to enter those conversations whenever they wish. Communication with your child should feel fun and spontaneous, not scripted and forced!
Well, there you have it. Short but sweet!
As I said at the start, we wanted to offer an article with some quick and easy tips. These are things you can easily incorporate into your daily parenting style.
When you do this, the bond and connection you have with your child will grow and flourish. They will have confidence to communicate with you frequently and in a high quality way.
If you have any experience with your own children in this area, we would love to hear all about it in the comments section below! Thanks for reading our 7 tips on connecting better with your kids!